Even Supergirl falls off the sky, sometimes.

I suck as a blogger. As a matter of fact, I shouldn't even dare calling myself a blogger. I don't post as often as I should and really, what was the point of opening up another blog account if I was just going to abandon it?

I'm sorry...

Is it possible to use my hectic schedule as a reason, though? It's been horrifying, lately. I wonder why I'm still alive and not in a room in a hospital with an IV needle stuck in my veins. I'm not sure what my colleagues, my bosses especially, at the office think of me, but it seems all of them believed I had the stamina and patience of a goddess, which I hadn't. Imagine three superiors ordering you to do three different tasks at once. Imagine doing that and not falling apart at the end of the day.

Okay so maybe I can't complain. It's a choice I've made to work there and honestly speaking I'm not sure I had the courage to try applying somewhere else, not to mention a private company where, although it pays more, it also might cause me my early death. Yeah well, it's all 'suffer in order to survive' thing, I guess.

I'm just hoping I won't lose my mind before I turn 30.


Well, speaking of schedule, I guess it's the one thing that ruined the frequency of me updating my fanfictions. This, above all, depresses me the most. I mean, let's not talk about how the readers must feel, let's first talk about how my brain feels. The poor thing is nearly overloaded with too many thoughts to think at once, from work matters to story ideas that haven't met their moment to be written yet. There are lots of new ideas, believe me. There are also still the old ideas, the stories I've already posted but haven't been updated yet.

I've mentioned the new fanfiction I've been writing called Beautiful Lie [to Believe in]. Well, I'm translating it into English too, and have posted the first chapter on LJ already. It's probably the one thing I prioritize the most right now--not saying that I'm putting behind the other stories, like House of Horrors and Love Song and also the 5sentence_fics drabbles (I've been writing the fourth installment! I swear it!). The ideas about that story are still very, very fresh, and I thought it'd be better to focus on Beautiful Lie first. Maybe because the theme is the heaviest, most intense I've worked on until now, but I feel very challenged to get this story on the go.


So I guess, now it's time to do the Fanfic Progress Recap.

• House of Horrors chapter 04 = 06%
• 5sentence_fics the fourth batch (prompts 16-20) = 80%
• Love Song chapter 02 = 08%
• Beautiful Lie [to Believe in] chapter 02 (English) = 0%
• Beautiful Lie [to Believe in] chapter 03 (Indonesian) = 07%

I regrettably say that I'm having a writer's block right now, but I still have the drabbles to do, and I like to think that it helps me a lot whenever I'm having this cursed block in my brain that doesn't allow me to write longer fics.


That's that for now. It's really, really late. I know it's bad but lately I've been going to bed after 1 a.m.

Don't tell my boyfriend; he'll be pissed.

Because you can never have enough time.

Alright so I didn't have time to update yesterday. It's been a horribly hectic day, to say the least. The funfair started at Friday and at Sunday I had a shift from 5 to 9 p.m. Well, actually, we were all told that the shift was supposed to begin at 3, so I hurried there just to find that the doors were LOCKED. Some smart ass must have forgotten to inform us that the shift hours had been changed. Luckily I was with my boyfriend so I didn't look too pathetic; to pass the two hours (that I could have used to take a nap instead) we went to the mall.

Anyhow, it wasn't really as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, the crowd wasn't overly annoying, not too many people but there were still plenty enough to make the situation less boring. We were lucky to have a post where it was dry, with cornblock pavement and had leakproof roof, and there was a toilet (however small and inadequate) and a place to pray. It did rain later last night, and I felt sort of sorry for those guys out there. I personally hate it when it rains and the ground turns to very icky mush under my feet.

The booths are interesting, really. There was this one by a local lab, and it provided free glucose and blood pressure test. I went to do a check up and the results were okay, except maybe for the body weight part. How the heck did I gain all those kilos? Fuck. I always fail at diets because my gastric can't take them. Every time I skip meals it will hurt like fucking hell. Maybe I should find a safer, more effective way to lose some weight... but I also hate sports. I'm a helpless case, yes I know.

Errr... yes, back to the main topic. Well the point is, it wasn't half as boring as I thought it would be, but then there was the four of us in our booth. I'm not really sure how it will be when there are only two. At Friday I'll have to be there again with only one other person and she's an elderly lady... I hope I can take the laptop with me or whatever... But maybe it's safer if I don't. I can't guarantee someone will not steal it, the area is pretty dangerous to be showing off fancy electronic stuff.


So yeah... Maybe I've been very, very negative lately. But how could I help it? The situation at the office had gotten awkward because one person spoke bad about the other person and the other person heard it and I happened to be the poor, innocent girl who had to listen to all the whining and bitching. I'd like to tell them to go shove their problems up each others asses and stop bothering me, but here's the ugly thing about working in a government office: there's so much hypocrisy hovering in the air you can actually choke yourself with it. Everybody has to pretend they are enjoying each others company when they really aren't, everybody has to say nice things despite wanting to bash against the next person's head. It's frustrating, at times, although if I have to compare it to working at a private company, it's much, much bearable (though the payment isn't half worth it). I'm the kind of person who gets irritated very, very easily (I think I've made that quite clear), so it's hard whenever I needed to swallow my own anger incase I found something or someone offending me.


I guess the only chance I can be a billionaire is to write a damn good gay porn and publish it world wide; get a contract with some TV station in the USA to do a movie or maybe even a series on my book and recruit those yummy, pretty Japanese rockers to star in the movie. Oh yeah~ I bet I'll be rich in no time! XD

The only problem is, will or will not PSC let the GazettE boys do porn? Only time will tell, people. All we can do is cross our fingers (and mail the company with a very convincing MOU).

Gaze-Porn will look like this:


(Replace the microphone with something else we all know only men own, you see then it is pure porn)


Or something that is even more easily translated as "We do porn like this, people, now worship us!":


(I can always talk about how he touched his nipple in the concert and then licked his god damn finger and turned me to an ugly goo, but I'll refrain because that will be an endless talk of its own)

I do wish I can be like X-Men's Storm.

I would love, love, love to write a long, probably detailed review of the movie Sherlock Holmes. Really, I would. In fact, that was exactly what I planned to do tonight. The tickets were bought, I already got dressed.

And it rained.


It rained like fuck. The sky was pouring buckets and buckets of water onto the earth and it was just impossible to see what's in front of you out there, not to mention going anywhere on a motorcycle.


So, no, no Sherlock Holmes tonight. No review. Nu'uh.


But my boyfriend actually went through that blizzard and knocked on my door, drenched to the bones. Poor thing...

It turned out to be quite a pleasant night because he stayed for dinner (yes, we let go of the 30,000 Rupiahs that we - err, he had to spend for the tickets). I just love it that my parents are probably the most welcoming parents in the world regarding whom their daughter is dating. Yeah, my boyfriend was well taken care of tonight. In fact, I think my Mom worried more about him getting sick than I did XD

Oh I hope he doesn't get sick. He's a hopeless case but he is still my boyfriend and he's too sweet not to love as much as I love him. I believe he's already asleep now. I wish him a nice dream... Well most likely about me. XD

I better get my own beauty sleep as well; God only knows what other emotionally disturbing things I have to deal with tomorrow. Can't be too prepared for whatever happens.


Good night, then.

And uh, yeah, watch the sun's eclipse with me tomorrow?